Personal Development vs Spiritual Growth

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why vs (versus)

I rather should use the word “and”, right?

Sure, yes, but for the sake of this article i have my reasons to distinguish between the two.

Although, in the end they are actually part and parcel of one very big parcel ;  )

The parcel that i call Consciousness and the individual journey of unfoldment of Soul in Consciousness from Matter to Spirit.

In my experience the relationship between the personal and the spiritual in us human beings is the like a Russian doll, one doll inside the other inside the other …

I view “myself” as a person, a finite individual incarnated in this mortal body.

I view my person as the present incarnation (embodyment) of my soul, as an expression inside/of my individual soul, which is traveling and growing thru incarnations.

I see my soul as one individualized aspect of Spirit, the All-There-Is, the Source/God.

Now this begs the – mind boggling – question: Where do “I” begin and where do I end?

For me this is a pretty nice and enlightening contemplation :  )

I guess it depends on where my identification lies, my “center of gravity” so to say.

In my therapeutic counseling work with people it is also clear that there is always a direction of development from the personal to the spiritual, from the solving of problems and healing of pathologies to the discovering and unfolding of potential soul qualities.

The threshold is fluid and non-linear, but the methods – of personal development vs spiritual growth – are specific to the situation and the level/stage a person is living in at the moment.

The 20. And 21. Century have produced a multitude of approaches, tools and methods to work with the person, the diagnosis and healing of the psyche with different approaches and schools of psychology in therapy and also the development of the person in goal-oriented coaching.

On the other hand, the “Science of Spirit and Soul” has been known by some from the time of the Vedas in India long ago and all thru the ages ever since.

In every religion that appeared in humanity there has been a small “mystical department” of people who dealt intently with the nurturing and unfolding of the soul, developing methods and means to prepare the personal to become trans-personal and universal.

I think it is the challenge of our age and the coming generations to unify those two great streams of conscious attempts, so the “I” as a person can expand and integrate into the “I” as a soul, which can in the ultimate destiny dissolve the “I” into the “All” of Consciousness.

How this all works and why, I guess this is ultimately a mystery, a wonderful mystery we call the Interplay of Life and Consciousness

I am really happy and thankful to be able to be a conscious and co-active participant in this endless voyage.  

In my own work with people this integral approach is expressed by the word “Innerworks” … (i made it up ;  ).

It means for me – first of all – the conscious attempt and systematic work to become fully aware where the person stands in his/her outer and inner world, and – based on that acknowledgment – work on the healing and integration of “traumatized”, not integrated parts of the personal psyche. 

When this is accomplished successfully we can focus on desired refinements and development of the personal character and personal goals.

Always my main focus will be on the Inner Work rather than simply accomplishing the “worldly goals” – nothing bad with that, they are actually a natural result of successful inner work on the personal level.

The aim for me here, on that level of personal development, is the integration and refinement of the person, the development of a consistent and functional personal ego (in the positive sense of the word) that can serve as a healthy foundation in the world for the transcendence of itself ( sounds like a paradox, doesn’t it? ;  )

On the other hand, the Spiritual Growth side-of-things is for me not so much about different methods and exercises to accomplish something, but it is rather the cultivation of specific  aspirations, attitudes and qualities to prepare my persona, my ego to become a ready and fertile ground for Soul/Spirit to “come in” and “take hold” in the persona.

As I said before, this kind of opening and transcending of the individual ego is a rather mysterious process that can not be forced or “done”.

It “happens”  when the person is ready for it. And the Inner, Spiritual Growth has its own rhythms and timings.

As a guide and teacher of integrated spirituality, what can be done is to allow conscious inner space and readiness to develop and grow.

The Sufi mystics of old often used the metaphor of  the bridegroom carefully preparing the bedroom in anticipation of his future wife. 

Read Rumi or Hafiz, and you think you are reading hot love poems :  ) but they are actually talking about Soul and God and they longing to unite with the All-There-Is.

The “marriage” of Persona with Soul is a gradual, ongoing process and it will result in a profound shift and change of the quality of one’s consciousness.

It is hard to describe this very individual process in adequate words in a more generalized manner, but I will try to say what I noticed in myself about it.

The difference between the “normal ego-based state of consciousness” and the more evolved state of consciousness at which the inner growth work aims, is reflected in their – somehow dramatically – contrasting characteristics:

— In the normal state of consciousness, I am more unconscious than conscious about what’s actually going on inside myself, more or less automatically following physical impulses, feelings, random thoughts, habits and outside influences without being aware where those come from. 

With the inner growth there comes an increasing awareness of the inner processes and the deeper and higher levels of my Self. Ultimately I become conscious of consciousness itself, as the nature and essence of my Being.

— A characteristics of the normal state of consciousness is distractibility. The always changing impressions and sensations from the outside, my physical needs and the seemingly random flux of thoughts and feelings from within produce a state of constant distraction. 

On the other hand, the inner consciousness is centered or concentrated. As the consciousness grows, and I learn to live more and more in the deeper consciousness, I experience a more consistent state of centeredness and concentration.

—  In the normal state there is a constant dispersion and scattered-ness of my attention in the emotions, thoughts and the outside world, almost if I would be thrown “outside of my self”. Even if I want to stop and observe a little what’s going on I have to take a deep breath and “pull myself back in” – to come back to myself, so to say.

By contrast, my deeper, more evolved consciousness is a consistently in-gathered and collected consciousness.

— The normal state of consciousness is a state of continual “disquiet and agitation”. No peace there! No tranquility!

As my consciousness grows, I becomes more and more aware of a deeper level of consciousness which is felt as an ever-existing groundswell of quiet, tranquility, inner silence and peace. Even in the midst of intense action :  )

— In the normal state, my consciousness is totally involved and identified with my body, my vital nature and my mind and the external world. It feels to me like I am the body, thoughts and feelings and circumstances. 

As consciousness evolves, I experience myself more and more as un-identified with my physical, vital and mental nature and the outer appearances. Instead of being identified, I rather observe them as a “detached” witness. This is hard to explain because it does not mean that I feel disconnected from what is going on inside of my psyche and body and outside of myself. It is rather like looking at all that from a higher perspective, so to say. 

— Because of the identification with “the world”, the ordinary consciousness is afflicted by polarity and duality of this 3. dimension — heat and cold, pleasure and pain, attraction and repulsion, past and future — which is an inherent characteristic of our physical, vital and mental nature. As a result, consciousness is in a more or less constant state of tension, disturbance and disequilibrium between those pairs of opposites. 

The higher consciousness by contrast is unmoved, consistent or steady. Associated with this quality, in the Vipassana tradition of meditation this state is called Samata — equanimity born of an equal response to the pairs of contraries.

— A fundamental characteristic of the normal consciousness is its sense of being a separate self or ego, that is, of being an individual who exists apart from the rest of the universe.

On the other hand, the inner consciousness is experienced as unity, universal and transpersonal, devoid of separation and division.

It is not that my body, the ego, my personal mind would disappear ;  ), but “I” feel them as only a small part of my Whole Self. Also I begin to feel others too as part of “my” Self, and “the world” in union with myself. A beautiful and indescribably liberating feeling of Oneness.

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I hope this little detour makes clearer why I make a difference between Personal Development and Inner, Spiritual growth: 

Personal growth is focussed on the development of the individual as a human being, the attempt to refine and perfect our human nature in all possible ways. Physical, emotional, mental, social and existential.

Inner, Spiritual Growth means the transforming and transcending the human State of Consciousness, a psychic and spiritual transformation of all the parts of my being through the action of an inner consciousness – the Soul – and then further on thru the direct influence of Spirit. 

Well, all that might feel a bit far out and far fetched, but it is not a theory.

In my work with myself and some of my clients I try a rather pragmatic and “down to earth” approach to prepare the personal ground for such transformation.

The development and nourishing of values and character qualities that will facilitate Spiritual Growth:

– Aspiration

“Until we know the ultimate truth, the Divine (not mentally but by experience, by change of consciousness) we need the soul’s faith to sustain out aspiration and hold on to the will to go towards it — but when we live in the knowledge, this faith is changed into knowledge.”

Sri Aurobindo

Aspiration for the Divine – the ultimate essence of all things and Life – is beautifully expressed in early Christian iconography and mystical Sufi poetry as “the Burning Heart”.

The heart often is also depicted with a little sword sticking in it. In my experience it symbolizes that we are somehow stung and hurt by the temporariness of the world. But this hurt also ignites the indwelling fire of longing for what’s beyond this existence.

Aspiration may start very simple in the way that you have a kind of vague feeling, a hunch that behind the common life and the universe there is something which is worth knowing, which is maybe the reason for being here.

You don’t really know what this “Beyond” could be, but you have to tend to it, keep it alert and alive. So it is nurtured and the inner fire is growing.

This “fire” is actually not only a metaphor but an actual upward-directed glowing that can be seen clairvoyantly around the heart.

In the dark of the night when we are outdoors and look up at the stars and feel the vastness of the universe we may sense a longing and want to send a prayer to The Unknown Beyond: “Take me, make me one, make me whole”.

Something like that I have experienced often and it is a beautiful feeling.

But to make it a lasting aspiration, I will need to activate my will and concentration and determination:

I want to find and know the Divine and live it. I feel that this is so precious and important, that knowing it and being it will give my existence a totally new meaning.

– Sincerity

Spiritual Growth is a serious business ;  ), it is not a hobby, no weekend affair that we pick up in our spare time or when we feel like it. It is an endeavor that actually interpenetrates every aspect of our life and more and more becomes the basis of our life.

For that to happen our aspiration needs to be sincere and true. Such sincerity brings with it the qualities of patience, persistence and perseverance, which allow us to walk the path, walk our talk and do the chosen practice no matter what the circumstances.

Sincerity also protects us from self-delusion, from hiding away or explaining away our weaknesses and shortcomings.

In that vein, sincerity goes along with honesty, the ability to look at ourselves straight on, without pink glasses, without dark glasses.

Sincerity shields us from pretension, from trying to appear as more (or less) as one actually is. Pretension is one of the great pitfalls of the ego. And especially tricky, when it is a “spiritual ego”.  

So, sincerity is an important quality to cultivate when we want to walk the path of spiritual growth.

– Faith

Faith, a controversial word for me, because it is often used in religion to make the believers adhere to church doctrine or ideology.

For me, faith is the ability to somehow feel, be convinced or believe that something is true and real without needing to have a real evidence or proof.

A psychologically healthy child has faith, by the nature of its innocence. And – as Jesus supposedly said – we shall not enter the kingdom of heaven unless we are innocent in our heart, just as children are.

On the spiritual path – that has also been called “the pathless path” – faith is the sure feeling that this path will “lead me home”, that the right things and people will show up exactly when I will need them – to show me the next step that I need to take, to securely lead me onwards.

And faith “tells me” that there is a rhythm and a rhyme to the inner growth that I can trust even if I don’t know it yet or don’t understand it exactly.

To develop the ability to “keep the faith” even in the face of obstacles, stagnation and seeming setbacks in our inner growth is of great importance for our progress.

– Knowledge / The Map / Mental Preparation 

“Nothing can be taught to the mind which is not already concealed as potential knowledge in the unfolding soul of the person. So also all perfection of which the outer man is capable, is only a realising of the eternal perfection of the Spirit within him. We know the Divine and become the Divine, because we are That already in our secret nature. All teaching is a revealing, all becoming is an unfolding”

Sri Aurobindo

Usually, in the beginning, this “revealing” that Aurobindo is talking about is by means of the Word, we get knowledge of something that we have not yet experienced by words spoken by somebody or read in a book or scripture or received from within, directly from our soul.

But in any case, it is only the agent into motion the process of inner knowing.

So when I read or hear something profound, I know from deep within if this is true and relevant for me, now at this point in my inner development.

That is the difference between intellectually gathering “spiritual” knowledge, reading one book that is dealing with spiritual or esoteric matters after the other, or be inspired – touched by Spirit – at the right moment by what I read in a scripture or inspired writing, what I hear from a wise person or what I “hear” whispered in my own heart.

Another matter is “The Map” ;  )

If you go exploring, it is a good idea to get yourself a map, so you get an overview of the landscape, the roads, the destiny, the distances. 

There are many “maps”, many descriptions of the spiritual path and “the true way” out there, so this can be a very confusing matter.

For myself, after studying much of that and knowing about many such maps, I have found it really helpful to develop for myself a framework – an overview of where I am going and what the whole Self-unfolding actually looks like – a contextual map that is wide enough, that is as undogmatic as can be so it can be integral, can hold all the different highways an byways of this epic voyage into the Great Unknown, the journey of the return from Person to Soul to Spirit to the Ultimate Unity of All-There-Is.

In case you are interested in “my Map”, you may want to read this article – “The Map is not the Territory” ;  )

And then there is this other matter, the preparation of the Mental itself, the preparation of the brain/mind, our mental faculties so to say, the mental aspect of our being:

A lot could and should be said about that – in my opinion – because I believe that humanity, the collective consciousness as such – is on the verge of discovering and integrating the Mental Plane, the ability to have and use thoughts consciously, actively and creatively instead of randomly and reactively.

By “Mental Plane of our Being” I mean conscious experiences concerning thoughts, mental activity, the observation, discernment and understanding of things, association, reasoning, deduction, logic, abstract thinking, the contact with spiritual and universal laws in scriptures, knowledge of esoteric (internal) realities and the results of this knowledge on my understanding of my life and world, and so on.

Such refined mental abilities are important to be able to “translate” inner experience of more subtle levels and bring them into words, into conscious awareness in my brain/mind.

Otherwise – if my mental facilities are not developed enough to do this translation – my inner experiences of deeper/higher levels of my Self may be only fleeting, dreamlike and I will not be able to integrate them into my overall conscious Self.

Well, I guess it will be interesting to dive deeper into such issues in another article at another time …

For now, maybe this may be of interest:

“The mind, the brain and the rest “

– A Guide

The Guru, the Spiritual Teacher, the knowledgeable wise Guide, the “older” and more experienced Companion …..

Is it needed to have such a person as Guide on your Journey of Spiritual Growth?

Or is it possible to be going it all alone, just you and your “God”?

This is a real good question, i would say, and a real timely one!

Because nowadays selfhelp-gurus are a dime a dozen on YouTube and the online bookstores are chockfull of esoteric and spiritual self-help literature. Kinda like a supermarket ;  )

And over the last 50 years or so we have seen many many gurus and leaders of spiritual movements stumble and “fall from grace”, getting entangled in games of money, power and all kinds of shades of sexual exploitation.

So! It seems that “the times are a-changing” in that respect.

In my own experience in this incarnation it seems that i have come full circle, so to speak:

…….. from becoming Devotee to a Indian Guru/Meditation Teacher in my youth
…….. to the healing and psychologic integration and teaching i got from a beloved Spiritual Therapist and Teacher
…….. to a few very precious and more advanced companions who did function as corrective mirrors and were also capable of kicking my ass ;  ) when needed
…….. and finally to simply being able to just follow My Own Inner Voice, the directions and hints of my Higher Self or Soul by way of  reading synchronistic events, cosmic coincedences and mostly by way of Intuitive Knowing.

The circle finally closed (in a kind of spiral-ish way ;  ) when i started to be able to serve as a Guide and Advisor myself, for the benefit of others on the Path.

Now i dont delude myself to always know whats best for the inner growth of another person in any moment and phase of the journey. In the end, each one’s path is unique and custom designed ;  ) and only one’s own Soul might know the whole story.

SO, my efforts as a Guide and Spiritual Advisor-of-sorts is always just to provide the secure space and wisely chosen framework that will support Inner Growth and also provide impulses, inspiration and appropriate methods to promote the qualities already inherent in the person to come to the fore, qualities that initiate and accellerate Inner Growth.

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– Means & Methods

The means & methods of spiritual development are nothing new, they have been around for very long.

Here i will just point to what i feel is important to explore and use and implement as a serious Spiritual Practice.

– Concentration, Contemplation and Meditation

The ability to focus and concentrate awareness is called Samata and to open the field of awareness in Vipassana Meditation.

I have written quite a lot about that and will just hint to one of those articles here:

How to meditate – A bit more seriously this time

In the terminology of classical Yoga this is in the realm of Jnana Yoga, the path of Knowledge or Self-realization.

– Prayer and devotional Practices, the Bhakti Path , path of loving devotion to a personalized god/deity.

– Selfless Actions, the Karma Yoga of Action 

– The Sangha, Company of Truth

Obviously, the quality of the people with whom i spend my time, will be of important influence on my consciousness, so i better choose them wisely.

I am not propagating that we all shall become Yogis now, Sadhus and walk around in orange robes ;  ). Far from it. I am not on the “Indian Trip”!

But it is obvious that the sages of ancient India as well as early Buddhist teachers knew a thing or two about the Return to Unity, the ways to consciously and systematically raise up in consciousness.
Those Yoga traditions i mentioned here address:
– the mental level > Jnana
– the emotional level > Bhakti
– the physical/action level > Karma
– the interpersonal/social level > Sangha

and they teach tried and tested methods to go about this task of ascension in consciousness.

Personally, I always tried my best to filter out and remove the “Indian-ness”, the cultural and religious components of those old times and try to find the essence for me to include in my spiritual practice. 

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All those methods together equate the Whole of the Spiritual Path of Inner Growth towards Union of Person, Soul, Monad and Spirit, All-There-Is.

If it is even possible to express all that in a concese and coherent manner, then i know only the work of Aurobindo that can do that for me.

In his Integral Yoga he has laid it all out in philosophical, psychological and practical terms.

And – even more amazingly – he has composed a epic 26000 lines long poem named Savitri, a Legend and a Symbol, that tells the whole story of this amazing journey in every poetic detail, the voyage of the Soul towards Unity.

… work is still in progress (as always ;  )

please come back again!